This post has been a couple weeks in the making but it has been hard for me to come up with the right words until now. The reason being is that my beloved Ashlee lost her battle battle with Chronic, Non-viral Hepatitis on June 25, 2016.I had to take her to the vet to be put to sleep (euthanized). It was the hardest thing I have had to do in a very long time and it broke my heart. I stayed with her until she was at rest. She went very peacefully but it was still hard to witness.
I'm sure the pet owners among you will know exactly what I am talking about and I'd like to say that I feel your pain and can totally understand now. For those that have not gone through the experience, I pray that you never have to. Don't get me wrong, if I had it to do over again I would because she was clearly suffering and the medicine was having no effect. She was unable to hold down food or water and she was clearly week and slowly dying. It was the humane thing to do and I stand by my decision even though it hurt like hell to have to do it.
I have contemplated taking you on a journey through all the emotions I felt the last 6 weeks but I don't feel ready for that right now. As I bang out this post, so many thoughts and feels are swimming around in my head it's almost unnerving. So many things I want to say but I just don't feel now is the time.
So, what does it all mean? What's the point of these last 3 blogs? Well, keeping people informed is one reason. Getting thoughts out of my head is another reason. Finally, there is somewhere I am going with all this...I'm just not sure I'm ready to go there yet. I certainly don't just want to jump into a deep topic like love at the end of a blog post. Let's just say that what started as just a few blog posts about a man and his sick dog is blossoming into much more than I can begin to cover in this post.
So, for now I will leave at this; Love is full of joy and pain and real love is realizing that the pain is nothing compared to the joy of loving.
Until next time, God Bless